What Will Our Date Night Look Like?

Remember how I wrote about our date night “rules”? Now that things are getting WAY more real over at Casa Murray, I am trying to envision what date night will look like.

The reality is, we don’t have that much family over here and we only have a handful of friends I would trust Baby Murray with. I suspect that at least for the first 6 months I won’t feel comfortable leaving her with anyone other than our parents.

The other side of it is, we will need to be MORE intentional with what we do during date night which I think is a good thing. It’s something we definitely don’t currently do!

Here are a few things that we currently do now, and how I foresee them changing in the near future!

Currently, we easily can do 4-6 date nights each month if we utilize our at-home date nights.

When Baby Arrives
The goal is to have at least 2 a month.

I’m not strict on the dress code.

When Baby Arrives
I think that I will be MORE strict on our dressing up for date night. It’ll be good to dress up for my mental health and our marriage.

Obviously, our date nights are baby-free. They can be multi-part AND last for hours.

When Baby Arrives
The first part will most likely be something like lunch out or perusing bookstores hand-in-hand, Baby Murray tagging along, of course. The second part will be something at home when we can put her to sleep and we can really focus on being together, like a puzzle, cooking together or watching a movie. Also, I have a feeling we will be putting a time limit on them.

Our date nights are generally never planned BUT at the very least we usually do a Saturday night date.

When Baby Arrives
We will most likely have more Saturday and Sunday morning/afternoon dates. 

I definitely feel like we will appreciate the time we get together WAY more once Baby Murray arrives. She will be our entire world, but that doesn’t mean we can neglect our marriage just because of our circumstances. Having her means we have to be MORE intentional and have to make it MORE of a priority for the sake of our marriage.

So tell me, how did your date nights change once you had a baby? What do you do to keep your date nights fresh and fun, while having a baby tag along? 

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5 thoughts on “What Will Our Date Night Look Like?

  1. We had the same “problem” when we had our daughter (in 1985) We lived in southern California and both our parents lived out of state. I don’t remember how old she was when we first left her with a trusted friend (also a mom of three) – by 6 months sounds right. We intentionally left the area and drove up to a timeshare presentation. It was exhausting for me. But after that we rarely left her with others until she was years older. I wasn’t working for the first year or so and only part-time for a few years so we just worked opposite hours so that one of us was always with her.
    I wish I could broach the subject of “date night” with my husband. He is retired and our daughter is on her own (nearby) so we have time alone together but it’s not the same as doing something out. We currently watch tv together – that’s it. I did mention going on an overnight trip to a nearby state park or even the east coast (about a day away) and staying overnight. He’s just a huge homebody. He doesn’t like to eat out – he’s got some health issues that make eating a problem sometimes.
    Anyway – looking forward to reading about your dating exploits 🙂


  2. Date night definitely looks different after baby comes. We’re lucky to have family close, but even then, we weren’t relying on them every single weekend. I think I can say that the past few months, our date night routine has finally looked more like what I’d like it to look. In an ideal world, we’d get to go out every weekend, but with needed to pay the babysitter, that’s just not possible. I have some fun at home date night ideas coming to the blog this year, I hope they’ll inspire you!


  3. i think that’s super wise to start considering that now! it definitely is different and once baby murray gets past the newborn stage, it is easier to do a bedtime routine and then the two of you can make dinner together and all that good stuff! glad you are continuing to think about how your marriage will change and evolve!


  4. Sounds like you have a good plan in place!
    The first couple of months, it seems impossible to go on a date or focus on marriage at all because the exhaustion, healing, hormones, etc. are insane. However, we had a Valentine’s Day dinner when Caleb was 3 weeks old, and also went and walked the mall a couple of times in his first week or two. Now that Caleb is older, we will often take him to dinner with us. If we go to the movies, we leave him with my mom.


  5. I imagine baby will come along with us most of the time until he’s mobile, but it is pretty strategic that we ‘happen’ to live in the same apartment complex with my parents, and my mom is ridiculously excited about “finally” getting to play grandma. Yesterday I was mentioning some idea I had to maybe take a trip to China near the end of this year (Angel and I miss living in China!) and Mom was like, “Oh, well then you’d have to get a Chinese visa for the baby too…unless…you just leave him with me!”


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