I think if you asked me a few years ago, I would have said it’s any time that we’re together, but frankly when you don’t have kids, that means date night is every night, which obviously isn’t true! Defining date nights have without a doubt enhanced our relationship, 100%!
When I really stopped to think about what defines a date night to our marriage it’s that ONE part of the date has to involve eye contact with conversation. Does that make sense? For example, if we just wanted to go to a movie, that isn’t a date night because we aren’t having a conversation or making eye contact BUT if we did a movie AND dinner that’s a date night because we’d be able to sit and have a conversation with each other. Another example, if we were to just cuddle up with each other and watch Netflix that is NOT a date night but if we were playing a board game at home that allowed us to actually talk and make eye contact then that would be a date night.
Although, we don’t have children yet, I’d also add that when we have kids, a date night will consist of one part of the date has to be child-free. Oh sure, we can have dinner with the kids for date night BUT they’ll have to be in bed or with a babysitter for the second part because intentional time without kids is also important to marriage.
Of course, there are less important “rules” to what makes a date night for me as well, one of those is dressing up. That doesn’t necessarily mean fancy gowns and suits BUT that does mean wearing a jersey for a baseball game or maybe wearing a nice summer dress for me or khakis for him to go out for milkshakes on a summer date night. Those are two things we don’t normally wear in our everyday. The second less important “rule” for date night is we have to have FUN! Duh. This isn’t always obvious, because like everything else when things are scheduled you can get into a rut and end up doing the same things every week or month, but making it a rule that it has to be fun or equally enjoyable means that weekly grocery shopping isn’t a date night, or doing errands is NOT a date night.
Date night shouldn’t stop because you’re married. Date night when you’re married should be a time of reflecting, reconnecting and letting loose a little bit to keep your marriage awesome.
So tell me, what are your date night rules? What are your favourite date nights to have with your spouse?