I’m so excited! Today, Amberly of A Prioritized Marriage and I have switched blogs today. Here Amberly talks about living her vows as a Latter-Day Saint. I hope you enjoy what Amberly has to say here and then you’ll head to her blog to check out how I live my vows as a non-religious person!
When Elyse suggested this idea for a collaboration, I was really excited. Elyse and her husband are non-religious and I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (aka Mormon), and a Christian. We thought it might be fun to talk about what living our marriage vows–which are directly related to our religious beliefs (in my case at least)–means to us and how we live those vows in our day-to-day lives.
I thought it might be good to give you a little background on what our religious beliefs are in regards to marriage first. The first thing you should know is that we do not makes vows, we make covenants (promises) with each other and with the Lord. As a member of the LDS faith, we believe that marriages last beyond this life and into the next. Our marriage ceremonies take place in beautiful temples around the world and although they are similar to other wedding ceremonies, there is one major different. Instead of being married “until death do us part” we are told and we believe that we are “sealed for time and all eternity.”
One of my very favorite things to do with Joe is to go to the temple sealings of our friends and family. I love holding hands with my eternal companion in the sealing room of the temple while we listen to the covenants made by the couple at the alter. It is a great reminder of our own wedding day, how giddy and in love we were and the promises we made to each other.
We believe that “after receiving the sealing ordinance and making sacred covenants in the temple, a couple must continue in faithfulness in order to receive the blessings of eternal marriage and exaltation” (Source). The sealing ordinance is also referred to as a “temple marriage” or “eternal marriage”. Our marriage relationship has so much potential here on earth and in the eternities, we just have to remember and actively keep the covenants we made to each other and the Lord.
One of our scriptures says, “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.” This means that couples should consider their marriage the most important relationship that they have here on earth, second only to their relationship with the Lord, “whom we have been commanded to love with all our heart” (Source). No other person, activity or possession should ever become a priority over our marriage relationship.
Because of the covenants that we have made with each other and the Lord, my husband and I put our marriage first. We are partners in life which means that we are a team for everything in life. Some of the things that we do to help us keep our covenants and help our marriage last for eternity are attend church and the temple together regularly, study the scriptures together, and pray together.
Regular date night helps us put each other first and work on strengthening our marriage relationship. In addition to going out without the kids and spending quality time together, we have to make a deliberate effort every single day to pursue one another. We have to be intentional with our words and actions every single day to make sure that the other person knows just how much we care.
Knowing our love languages help us find ways to share our love and work on the connection that we have as a married couple. Taking the time to learn what makes your spouse feel loved and then intentionally loving them in a way that they understand, but also in a way that comes naturally to you is great!
A couple of years ago, we started a tradition of weekly family meetings and companion inventory. Most often, the two of them are combined, but serve two different purposes. Our family meetings serve as a way for all of us to get on the same page for the coming week and to talk about anything big that is coming up further down the road. Right now, our two little ones don’t have much involvement, but in the future, we expect that they will. Click here to read more about our family meetings and how we use them to better our family and our marriage. Companion inventory goes a little deeper. This is when we talk about our relationship, the good and the bad, and what we need to be doing differently. The goal of our inventory is to open the lines of communication, be more aware of how we are treating each other and the relationship that we have, as well as giving us an opportunity to build one another up and strengthen our marriage. Click here to read more about how we conduct our companion inventory to be efficient and helpful to our marriage.
The relationship that I have with my husband is the most intimate one in my life. I saw a formula once that said that intimacy is talk+togetherness+time. When you say the words intimate or intimacy, most people immediately think of the physical aspect of marriage, but it is so much more than that. In your marriage you have emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, spiritual intimacy, financial intimacy and physical intimacy. We work together on a daily basis to increase our intimacy in each of those areas, helping us have the deepest relationship possible and keep the spark alive throughout eternity. Click here for 22 ideas to increase the intimacy in your own marriage.
We believe that marriage is more than the covenant that man and wife make with each other. Marriage provides the foundation for a strong family that the couple can bring children into. Although the greater goal of our marriage is to raise our children and provide them with the education and direction they need to become, our relationship with each other is what matters most. If we are not working daily to make our marriage a top priority, it will move from the backseat to the truck, to a random junk closet that never gets opened. We take our wedding covenants seriously and do everything that we can do to keep them so that we will be able to live together and with our loved ones for all eternity.
If you have any other questions about our wedding covenants, the sealing ordinance or our faith, please feel free to contact me via the contact page or e-mail listed on my website!