A to Z of a Happy Marriage

Patience

patience-just-murrayed

I’m sure we’ve all heard the saying “Patience is a virtue” and it’s 100% true. Patience is one of those things that not everyone is a natural at and it needs to be learned, especially when trying to have a successful marriage.

“It is difficult to be patient but to waste the rewards for patience is worse.” – Abu Bakr

The Mister and I are far from perfect and we don’t have the perfect marriage either. One of the things we both struggle with is patience with each other. Oh sure, some days it’s easy to have patience with each other but then there are THOSE days when we are both being short with each other. We both continue to work on it, individually and together. For me personally, when I lack patience with The Mister it usually revolves around something I feel “must” be done a certain way or “should” happen a certain way.

Patience in marriage means not being quick to react when your spouse unintentionally hurt or angers you. It doesn’t mean NEVER reacting when something upsets us. But imagine belittling your spouse just because you were angry about something trivial they did. How do you feel moments after? I don’t know about you but I never feel good after I’ve reacted to something when a bit of patience would have been the best approach. It also doesn’t mean you sit stone-faced “listening” to your spouse rant either.

There are MANY instances that patience can be implemented in marriage.

  • Fighting fairly with your spouse
  • When you’re having difficulty communicating with your spouse
  • When your spouse isn’t paying attention to you
  • When kids are being wild and crazy

Patience in marriage does have HUGE benefits for your marriage.

  • It allows you to think before you speak and results in fewer arguments.
  • It shows your spouse that you care about their opinions.
  • Allows each other to vent frustrations in a nonjudgmental way.

And lastly, here’s some tips to help you be patient in your marriage:

  • Practice everyday.
  • Stop and think before you react. Every. Single. Time.
  • Focus on your mindset.
  • Eliminate thoughts that center around what you feel “must” or “should” happen.

Patience can mean a lot of things, it means not being quick to react to something hurtful or negative that your spouse says or does but ultimately patience SHOWS your spouse that you care enough about what they are saying whether it’s good or bad because you care about them.

So tell me, do you have endless amounts of patience? How does it help or hinder your relationship?

Next up, quality time!

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8 thoughts on “Patience

  1. Patience is definitely something I need to work on. I am finding that in my marriage instead of having an emotional response to a situation I need to wait a little while to say anything, if I ending up needing to even once I’ve cooled off.

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  2. Some days I have all the patience in the world, but most days I’m a super short fuse. My husband jokes with me on my good days when I say that I’m being patient… he knows better ๐Ÿ˜‰ Haha! I react much better when I’m being patient, but sometimes my anxiety really affects my patience and my whole mood goes sour! Great tips and reasons for being patient!

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  3. ahhh these are such helpful tips and a great reminder. totally agree with audrey that it can be hard to be patient when anxiety takes over – i feel that too. now that i have weird hormones coursing through my body – it’s getting even more tough but that means i just need to keep working harder on it! my husband tends to have a whole lot of patience for me!

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    1. Anxiety always makes me lose patience as well, Chelsea and I’m glad you continue to work on patience during your pregnancy instead of just giving in to the hormonal impatience!

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